Reflection and New Beginnings

Today marks the one year anniversary of a day that changed my life.  It was the day I was laid off from my sales job and stripped of one of my major external identities.  For me, this year has been a juxtaposition of significant hardship and deep contentment; of great uncertainty and also a peaceful knowingness that I have never experienced before.

I have been transformed and will continue to transform.  Do I attribute this solely to the event of losing my job? No, although I definitely believe it to be a trigger event that propelled me further along the path of personal growth and development, which is why I am choosing to recognize this particular day. 

Anyhow, I have been contemplating how to share my experiences and revelations with those who are closest with me, so I have decided to enter the world of blogging.  I feel it is important for me to share my soul in order to continue to live an authentic life.  The transformation that is ocurring within me is much too great for me to not talk about with my closest friends and family.  Additionally, I am realizing that as I awaken to my true self/nature that I am choosing to end certain behaviors that do not serve me or my core values anymore and the thoughts I express here may help to offer an explanation for any changes seen in me.  Rest assured, I am not going through a crisis or trying to latch on to a new identity.  Rather, these changes are inevitable as I awaken to my true nature and gain a heightened sense of self awareness.  Through practices such as yoga, meditation and self study I have expanded my consciousness and the result has been unparalled feelings of health, wholeness and well-being that I have never experienced before.  So another goal with sharing this information is that it might resonate and help someone advance on his or her own personal journey towards optimal health and well being.  I truly believe this way of being and living is accessible to everyone and is what we, as humans, are destined for.
 

Without going too far back in history, I will just say that my life has always been rich with blessings.  Like many, I know that on the outside I appeared to have everything I could possibly want, and I did.  However, like many people have been known to say, I felt that something was missing; like there had to be more to life than what I was experiencing.  When I felt this way, I would instantly feel guilty or judge these thoughts, dismissing my feelings by telling myself I had everything I could possibly want.  Clearly, I was looking to all things external for peace and happiness.  I also used to blame these feelings on a lack of inspiring work, which I definitely think was part of it, but one must take full responsibility for their own well being and happiness.  (In regard to work, I also believe it is not necessarily WHAT you are doing but HOW you do it that really matters.)  Long story short, these feelings inspired me to explore the subject of personal growth, self development and spirituality.  Some of the earliest books and teachers that I exposed myself to were Dr. Wayne Dyer (specifically Manifest Your Destiny) and Eckhart Tolle (The Power of Now and A New Earth).  These books were instrumental in shifting my consciousness from just my thoughts to the awareness behind my thoughts.  According to Dr. Elliott Dacher in his wonderful book "Integral Health, The Path to Human Flourishing" it is a very important shift to be able to simply observe the mind, as it frees up some space between a thought and your emotional reaction to it, offering a significant release from needless suffering.  I also started practicing yoga.  As I continued down this path of inner exploration I knew in my heart that I was not doing work that inspired my soul.  And I struggled with that, yet I still did not know exactly what I wanted to do.  (Now I have learned that I could not have reasoned my way to figuring out what my true calling was or forced a solution, but believe me, I definitely tried!)  Becoming a mother was also an overwhelmingly tranformative experience that caused me to further realize the importance of never wasting a second of this precious life.  It also made me determined to set an example for my daughters on what it means to live a life of integrity and wholeness.

So one year ago today, when I was called into the conference room to receive the news that the company I worked for was reducing its sales staff by almost half, I knew that this was a gift from the universe to allow me time to pause, reflect and create the exact life I wanted for myself.  Being 9 months pregnant with my second baby, it was also clearly a blessing to have unexpected time home with my children.

I will not say it has been all rosy.  Losing your job is still traumatic and it took its toll both financially and emotionally on our family.  But I strive to remain thankful for all that shows up in my life, particularly the challenges, as they certainly do provide the most opportunity for growth.  This year has been a prime example of that for me.  While there is still a long road to get to where I dream of being, I can say with complete certainty that I am enjoying every step of the journey.

  

I could not have guessed looking ahead one year that I would be enrolled in a Yoga Teacher Training Program.  In addition to this, I have decided to begin a 10 month program next week to earn a Health Coaching Certification through B1 Community (www.b1community.com).  Many of you might be wondering what this term "Health Coach" really means.  That's ok, it even took me a while to wrap my head around it, which I think is an indication of our culture's connotation of the word "health." (Most people think primarily of the physcial body, but the type of health I am referring to is an integration of a person's body, mind and spirit, which creates everlasting, sustainable health and wellness and authentic happiness.)

So here is my best explanation.  The following is taken from the reading assignment for my first class:

"In North America, we come from a mechanistic, fragmented perception and are moving into one of wholeness and connection. This is called the paradigm shift and can be seen in every field. It began to be noticed in the 1940s with quantum physics and has spread to all areas of our culture.

It is important to realize that the creation of the B1 Health Coaching role matches the paradigm shift. The role is an integrated one based on wholeness and connection. B1 health coaches address the whole person--body, emotions, mind, energy and spirit. Generally speaking, these areas have been divided up so that doctors take care of the physical body, the psychologists care for the mental and emotional aspects of a person, the person of the church attends to the spiritual needs and almost no one in North America until recently has worked with the energy system of a person. B1 health coaching is based on the concept that all systems are connected to one another.

In conclusion to this very lengthy blog post, I would like to share a few additional excerpts that really spoke to me from "Integral Health, The Path to Human Flourishing" by Dr. Elliott Dacher.

"All of us want a life of authentic health, happiness and wholeness.  We want to go beyond our usual sense of health and life.  We want to live with purpose, passion, intimacy and joy.  But you have to want that with your whole being.  You have to want that more than the comfort of what you now know because authentic health will change you.  Conventional health is simple.  Just follow what you've learned.  A far-reaching health requires a transformation of the mind and heart.  This holistic and evolutionary shift results in integral health.

What is holding us back?  Why have we settled for ordinary health when so much more is possible?  The answer is so close that it is difficult for us to see.  We've been trained to deal with suffering, distress and disease by looking outside of ourselves by relying on remedies, therapies, techniques, health practicioners, self help, and self-improvement programs.  Similarly we have been trained to look outward for happiness seeking pleasure from materialism, success, fame, romance, sexuality, alcohol and drugs.  These can comfort us for moments but cannot transform our ordinary health into enduring, exceptional health.

For this we need to redirect our efforts.  We have been looking outward towards wordly experiences rather than inward towards our essence.  That is our dilemma in the West.  We have gained mastery over the physical and lost touch with the spiritual.  To transform life and health we must shift our gaze inward where we will find the ever present source of exceptional health and healing.

Each of us is given a sealed envelope at birth containing a map with instructions that can take us to a precious health and life.  At several points in each lifetime we are given the opportunity to open this envelope and discover its inner contents.  Perhaps it is through a communion with nature, the arts, or athletic competition where we briefly touch an elevated state.  Or perhaps it is a brush with serious disease, death or loss, manybe an unexpected moment of illumination and inspiration, or a persistent and unrelenting sense that there is more to life than we are living.  Some of us will be profoundly and permanently moved by such experiences, grasp the opportunity and begin down the path toward what were previously unknown and unimagined possibilities.  Yet most of us will be too busy, too content, too quick to apply a remedy and diagnostic label to suffering, too preoccupied with the materialism of life or too hypnotized by everyday existence.  Caught in the perpetual cycle of day to day life with its alternating pleasures and pains, some of us will let this uniquely human opportunity slip away unnoticed.  We will pass this unopened envelope on to the next generation, assuring ourselves of a "normal" life and ordinary health, leaving the deeper mystery and its treasures for others to ponder." 

I know that I have never wanted to settle for ordinary with anything, especially when it comes to my life!  How about you?